THIS BLOG RATED PG

I WOKE UP AT 5:30 THIS MORNING. AFTER A TRIP TO THE BATHROOM, I LAID DOWN AGAIN BUT FOR SOME UNKNOWN REASON I COULD NOT FALL BACK TO SLEEP. UNUSUAL FOR ME. MINUTES TURNED INTO HALF HOURS, HALF HOURS INTO HOURS..
I COULDN.T SLEEP. THEN MY MIND BEGAN TO WANDER, THINKING OF THINGS THAT HAD HAPPENED THE PREVIOUS DAY...STILL AWAKE. THEN I REMEMBERED BELINDA'S BLOG ABOUT THEIR CHRISTMAS MORNING. THAT WAS ONE OF THE FUNNIEST THINGS I HAVE EVER READ. BLESS HER HEART, SHE SHOULD BE A WRITER. STILL AWAKE...AND THEN, MY SLEEP DEPRIVED WEIRDO BRAIN SHIFTED INTO SECOND GEAR, AND THE WORD CR*P BEGAN TO WORK ITS WAY INTO MY PSYCHE..AND I BEGAN TO WONDER..HOW WOULD THEY SAY THAT WORD IN DIFFERENT COUNTRIES?
IN FRANCE WOULD IT BE "LAPOOP"? IN RUSSIA, HOW ABOUT SHITZKI? I GERMANY..
SCHITT? CHINA...OLDCHOW? (STILL AWAKE...) IRAQI..KURDS TURDS?..PLEASE LET ME FALL ASLEEP...AFGANISTAN...OSAMA (I HOPE THEY GET THAT ONE)....I FINALLY GAVE UP AND GOT UP AND MADE SOME COFFEE AT 8 A.M....DRANK THE WHOLE POT
AND NOW I'M TELLING YOU ABOUT THE EXPERIENCE. I'M REALLY HAVING A
CRAPPIE....NO WAIT, THAT'S A FISH..THAT'S A GOOD THING...A CRAPPY DAY. HERE IT IS 4P.M. SATURDAY AFTERNOON...I THINK I'LL TAKE A NAP......UNCA JERRY